No YOU da ho!

So a good friend of mine recently announced that he was leaving New York. Along with the list of reasons you’d expect to find: the pace, the daily grind, the competition, the corporate culture -  there was also a rather unique reason. Apparently there is so much crazy (and very creative) sex made available via Craiglist, it can turn the most timid experimenter into an over-booked, over-sexed , sleep-deprived former-psychology major.

Not one to be abandoned by a friend to the Bermuda triangle that is the Midwest, I decided to take this as a challenge and see what I could find in a less cosmopolitan, decidedly less sex-and-the-city city then well, THE city. I gave myself 15 minutes on Craigslist, to see how readily available and kinky the sex could be somewhere else. We went with Idaho. Seemed average enough - even tame. What follows are my scientifically sound findings.

The more relationship-oriented sections (M4M, W4M, etc.) that are a mix of nice and naughty on NYCL, turned out to be pretty homogeneously "nice" in Idaho. But I knew where to look for the salacious stuff…

First I tried Missed Connections. Disappointingly, it wasn’t quite the --“we banged in the 6th floor bathroom, and then 5th. Call me and we’ll do it again of the 3rd” of NYCL. Nowhere near, in fact. Par example:

man w donuts n milk at walmart on [date] late night - w4m - 19 you had milk and donuts, facial hair. i joked i would kick ur shit outta the way if you went to go get jelly filled donuts, you were REALLY REALLY sexy hit me up if you read this if you can tell me the last thing you said to me ill know it was you !! or not just wanted to let you know i thought you were sexy !!

Nonplussed, I moved on to Miscellaneous Romance. There I found a number of adds, much like this one:

Cute Couple Seeks Woman of Interest - mw4w - 32 Cute Boise couple in their early 30's seek a woman 20 to 35 for Summer fun. From camping and boating to simply hanging out for a backyard BBQ and hottubing, this could be one of the best summers ever! Seeking an intellegent, attractive non-smoker comfortable around two well behaved kids. Drop us a line with a few pictures if you have any interest.

Ok, so in Idaho, miscellaneous romance isn’t the place where you divulge really bizarre sexual fantasies and ask for helpers. Apparently that’s just New York. In Idaho, you have a polite threesome and then have a BBQ with the kids. 

Before I was ready to give up and admit defeat to child-friendly summer fun and winking at the Walmart, there was still Casual Encounters. From my research, in the NY version, this section is the least colourful--pretty much quick, to the point requests for one-night stands. Still, I had a few minutes left on the clock….

And lo and behold, I was not disappointed! I won’t give any direct quotes, for fear of my grandmother finding out I even know how to spell certain words. But, there were adds for gang-bangs with lactating women, orgies (read: m4m4m4m4m4m4m4m), amateur porn, and some much more exciting and truly bizarre stuff, that I even feel dirty typing. (But you can see for yourself at www.craigslist.com)

In conclusion, it would seem that there are sketchy (or sexually open, whatever your opinion…) people everywhere. Even in Idaho. There, they just have more tact and are a little better at compartmentalizing. Casual Encounters is the place for it all, should you ever find yourself alone and frisky in the Gem State (abundant in natural resources as it is!).

And so, dear friend, I beg you not to leave New York because you can have kinky sex everywhere. And if you stay here,  I volunteer to help you keep to a moderate activity schedule, so you'll have time for all of your sexcapades, your job and racquetball too!